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The Story Behind . A Self-portrait Series

An Awakening Woman
A Self-portrait Series
Oil on canvas, 2021
155x222 cm

I am my own muse. I am the subject I know best. The subject I want to better.

Frida Kahlo

I've always been a keen observer of the feelings and senses, engaging them in everything I see, feel, know, do. A Sensualist, a Sensitivist attempting to learn how to perceive and digest sensory data. A Soul Seeker, trying to look beyond the veil of perception, knowing earth is a play where souls of Light act out human patterns with each other in order to evolve and learn how to balance out their Masculine and Feminine polarities and find the Golden Mean to ultimately share Love. More so, as an independent artist and a Spiritual Activator I consider it to be my mission to fullfil my sacred calling and spiritual hunger to serve.
 

The greatest gift of the Wanderer is knowing that the home is within and everywhere we go, there we are.


As a devoted Wanderer and an exploring Warrior on the divine path that unites heart and mind, it felt like a soul driven purpose to explore and develop more self-awareness and intrinsic self-worth through drawing and painting the human body, also and especially my own. The nakedness of my portraits is a message of no longer wanting to hold any pretenses, but to feel unabashedly myself. Not in an overbearing manner, but in a pure, vulnerable and conscious way. It is probably why I started creating a hopefully neverending series of self-portraits. To keep on breaking down my own human limiting beliefs, lodged in family patterns next to outer imposed collective mindsets, in order to return to Pure Consciousness — the real core of our human being, and to present and activate this more healed version of myself into the world.


I make art to show my soul I am listening.
Pat Wiederspan Jones

Not only do I find pleasure in turning emerging, whether or not collective feelings, emotions and thoughts into self-portraits, through generating them I receive strength and valuable self-nurturing insights. To resolve the trauma and wounds of abandonment, unworthiness, separation,... coming from both collective and genetic lineages, but to also give this dark side a right to exist. Because the truth I find in this darkness, holds the greatest potential for inner growth. And to not become lost in it I give voice and vision to these shadows, embracing them fully, so I can energetically release them for good and heal.


However, interpreting these conscious and unconscious processes requires a certain amount of devotion to understand life on a deeper level. It calls for embracing one's vulnerability, it requires a growing knowledge of one's shadows coming from society and our bloodlines, a heightened intuition, a lot of stillness and especially a lot of not knowing at all. All of that topped with some magical pixie-dust.
 

To trust in the Divine is total.

By acting on inspiration as it comes to me I'm learning to sense, experience and trust this omnipresent connection with the Divine. To grasp and emphasize this higher vibrational state of consciousness I am very much drawn to integrate dream symbols, cosmic meaning, words or even lyrics that pop into my mind, using them as access points to the Divine and the subconscious mind. I feel them tangibly seeping in as a sign from an always responding Universe that resides within us. I believe that through using these metaphors, any ego defense mechanisms and disbelief we may have, gets bypassed. They feel like clues to a larger truth, teaching me to look through the eyes of eternity — the eyes of heart-knowing, to approach my life as a sacred journey back to Pure Consciousness.

What is it that the artist can't say?
 

Yet, I will always allow my work to emerge naturally from each small brush stroke. My hand then somehow knows how to solve any riddle I might be wrestling with in the prison of my mind. In such way, through being more open, flexibel and fluid, instead of resisting and struggling, I'm learning the qualities of quickly flowing ink and gently dancing oils. Water also helps me to remember to draw power from my own deep inner resources. To examine and experience the Feminine and Masculine in me as a tool of the Light — the embodiment of a natural flowing magnificence.
 

Art is no doubt a very complicated expression of the human soul.
Carl Gustav Jung

My works of art are creations sprouted from a unique inner motive I can endlessly learn from, hopefully also inspiring and supporting other awakening souls to explore their own growth edges and inner resilience, finding their own perfect path. I feel that when my art reunites itself with content coming from a deeper level, I can begin to understand thatThe Journey Of My Awakening Soul is meant to unfold naturally into Unconditional Love and Compassion.

For it is said that we are not responsible for what our eyes are seeing, we are responsible for how we perceive what we are seeing — through the lens of fear or through the lens of Love.


 

Art Gallery A Self-portrait Series

 

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